I am making myself go insane. I need to tell my family whats going on with me because its just really awkward between me and my family now. I have no idea how to bring it up though. I just want to be like Mom, "I didn't leave Jason to date Esse. Esse had nothing to do with Jason and I breaking up, we broke up her and I even became friends. However, I did break up with Jason to be with a girl. I'm not dating anyone currently, but I know that's the answer you are wanting to hear. I wish I could explain to u y I'm wearing boys boxers and baggy cargo shorts, but I know I won't be able to explain it till it makes any sense to you. Just know that it makes me happy and you should be happy with that. I can't wait to have my first gf because its going to bring me happiness that I have only ever fantasized about actually feeling. I'm worried you think I am unhappy now, and I don't want you to think I'm unhappy because I've chosen to be gay. I seem unhappy because I feel so trapped by the people I love and the things I love. I am not quite sure how to mesh the two, but I feel the best way is to make each other aware of the other. I only as for your acceptance of my decisions." Now, if I only had the balls to tell my mother that.